I still cling to this idea that when I meet you, I won’t be able to scare you off. I won’t be too much. I won’t talk too much, or say the wrong thing. You won’t grow tired of me after too much time together too soon. And I won’t have to convince you ofContinue reading “A glimpse of you.”
Category Archives: Musings
Puppy love.
The first time around, I was struck by his beauty. He was sleek, fashionable, and just a touch dark and edgy. He was full of personality, but at times overdid it. He had his moments where he made me so proud, but I never trusted him 100%. There were countless times he embarrassed me, increasingly so towardsContinue reading “Puppy love.”
Here now.
It’s a strange phenomenon I’ve been experiencing lately. I often find myself looking back on my younger self, And I smile. At her naïveté. At her willingness to fall in love with strangers. At her drunken bathroom best friendships. At the way she danced the night away. At the way she allowed herself to beContinue reading “Here now.”
Onward.
I don’t really know what’s next. I have a lot of different ideas. All of them a little out there. All of them scary. But all of them are also way more exciting than anything I have going on currently, and I think that’s worth the risk.
Just another night.
It was cold. It was rainy. It was 10:30pm. I still had 3 more long work days ahead of me. On any other night, I would have been more than content with a shower, a snack, and snuggling into bed with Netflix. But tonight was different. Tonight we had plans. Plans we’d talked about allContinue reading “Just another night.”
A letter for Travis Tucker.
Travis Tucker. A name straight out of a country song. We dated for a brief couple of months about 3 years ago. We met a few weeks after I broke up with my first and only serious boyfriend. I had been the one to end things, so I was excited to be single again andContinue reading “A letter for Travis Tucker.”
Kind of love.
I want that “i can’t wait to see you” | “me either” kind of love. I want the kind of love you never get tired of. I want the kind of love that doesn’t tremble. I want the kind of love that you never question. I want the kind of love that makes everything else aContinue reading “Kind of love.”
Not for lack of trying.
I have been trying so hard. Trying to accept my circumstances. Trying to be grateful. Trying to stay positive. Trying to imagine a new life that excites me. Trying to let go of the life that was ripped away from me. Trying to do the right thing. Trying to stay informed. Trying to amplify theContinue reading “Not for lack of trying.”
According to plan.
At the time of writing this, I’ve just woken up on my first morning back home after 17 days in Colombia. As I went upstairs and made my coffee, looking out at the cold, gray backyard, I felt sorry for myself for the first time. If you’ve kept up with my writing, you’ll know thatContinue reading “According to plan.”
Endings & Beginnings
All of my past relationships share one common moment. Not butterflies before the first kiss, or when your stomach drops the first time someone tells you they love you. I’m talking about the moment when I’ve realized that it’s over. Maybe not today, maybe not this week, maybe not even this year. But it’s over,Continue reading “Endings & Beginnings”